From the recording Oldest Roadies on the Earth
The original version of this song appears on the N.I.C album. The song was written by Brian Ralston in his 40s, thumbing his nose at Old Father Time with a blues rock style track. By the time of this recording, OFT was starting to win the battle, so the song was changed to a more acoustic feel, and a middle was added.
Lyrics
Mid Life Crisis
(B. Ralston)
The face in the mirror don't look like me
There's skin on my head where my hair used to be
Can't fit into my last years' clothes
Can't touch my navel, can't see my toes
No point in bizarre disguises
I won't win no beauty prizes
Get used to these extra sizes
Cause I, I, I, I, I'm
Happy with my midlife crisis
No matter what I wear my belt's too tight
And I wake up five times every night
Just three red wines, alcoholic haze
And the hangover lasts for days and days
Got to make some sacrifices
Keep away from food with spices
I don't need no extra vices
Cause I, I, I, I, I'm
Happy with my midlife crisis
So where the heck did my prime go
And why the hell won't time slow down
My blood pressure's up, but my old fella's down
My libido's dragging on the ground
No point in adult hide and seek
Cause the flesh is useless and the spirit's weak
Don't want no girls with fancy prices
Bringing afternoon surprises
Leave me to my own devices
Cause I, I, I, I, I'm
Yes I, I, I, I, I'm
Yes I, I, I, I, I'm
Happy with my midlife crisis.